MLM Language defined

Every now and then my cell phone will ring with the number of a mysterious stranger, I get excited as I nervously push the talk button wondering what interesting person may be on the other end.  Oh my gosh! A friend I have not spoken to in years! After the small talk comes the MLM pitch and at that point I save the number so as to screen future calls thus preventing correspondense.  All pitches contain the same type of "I just got sold on this company at a tuesday night meeting" language, so I have taken it upon myself to define, in lay mans terms, the pitch.

Ground Floor Opportunty: There are only several thousand other people that are big enough suckers to have signed up so far!  Put too much into this and you will be living on a hard cold concrete floor!

Do you have 4 Friends?:  Well soon you won't we will teach you to ostracize yourself from everybody you hold dear.

Residual Income:  You will spend lots of money on products you can pay half for at wal mart, if others are dumb enough to do the same you will get a check every month, so really you will end up with a lot of stuff you don't need and put a couple bucks in my pocket.

What are you doing thursday night?:  Come to a meeting that is second in high pressure only to time share presentations and no there will not be a free ski weekend.

Have not yet hit critical mass:  And never will. Any time and money you will invest will help us get there, however we will always just fall short.

Do you remember me?:  I already talked to everyone I know, now I am just calling random people from high school.

5% of people have 95% of the wealth!:  By joining you will help those 95% get wealthier and you may fall lower in that 5%.

I know people get rich in MLM's but ask yourself are these really people I want to associate with, let alone become?